Simply Soul Searching

WEEK TWO: RELATIONSHIPS

RECONCILE

Matthew 5:21-24 (NRSV)

You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment… Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.

A few years ago I was attending a worship service at a new church for the first time. I was relieved that the worship practices were familiar and comfortable for me. But right before the offering was collected, most of the people stood up and walked out! The pastor just smiled and said, “Try to back in an hour so we can continue our service.”

No, this didn’t really happen. But if we were to truly heed Jesus’ words, every worship service would be interrupted by people who need to make amends before offering their gifts. Most of us have at least a few folks with whom we should reconcile!

The word reconcile means to restore friendship and harmony, resolve differences, or to make consistent or congruent. As followers of Christ, we are to do all we can to restore harmony and resolve differences when we have hurt or conflicted with someone. How often do we choose instead to distance ourselves from one another? How often do we choose to let our anger smolder and burn? How often do we cover our embarrassment by making flimsy excuses? We are instructed to do better.

The Lutheran Church of the ELCA has a beautiful worship practice of sharing the peace with one another. The practice is explained at http://www.elca.org:

The “exchange of peace” (or “sharing the peace”) is an act of reconciliation… The exchange of peace is a ministry, an announcement of grace we make to each other, a summary of the gift given to us in the liturgy of the Word… Because of the presence of Jesus Christ, we give to each other what we are saying: Christ’s own peace. 

This practice is a demonstrative acknowledgement that I am broken, we all are broken, but we are forgiven and united through Christ- and so we all can share his precious peace. I once had the very difficult and yet beautiful opportunity to share the peace with someone at a time when our relationship was strained. I wasn’t being noble or holy- I just wasn’t given much choice- the person was right near me! But oh, I felt such peace afterward, and I was able to worship without the guilt, anger, regret, and embarrassment that had burdened me.

Jesus compares our anger with someone as ‘judge-able’ as murder. Jesus knows that our mutual anger, hostility and resentment are actually killing US. Jesus knows that we can worship God wholeheartedly only when we see one another as equally beloved and forgiven children of God. Jesus calls us to be his diverse yet congruent Body of Christ, brought together in peace and harmony to worship and to serve.

Did anyone come to mind as you read this devotion- someone with whom you may need to reconcile?

How might the practice of sharing the peace serve as a guide for you to make amends?

There are times when our efforts of reconciliation are not welcomed, or when we are not able to reconcile with someone because of distance, time, or even safety concerns. How might you offer reconciliation with yourself?

Loving Christ Jesus,

You love all of us, and you desire that we love one another. Your way of genuine love includes making amends and reconciling with those we have hurt. Give us the awareness, the wisdom, and the courage to do so! Please forgive us for the hurts we have caused. Help us to unite with others in order to serve and worship you wholeheartedly… with pure hearts that have been reconciled… sharing the peace that comes to us only from you.  Amen.

WEEK ONE: REPENTANCE

 REBUKE

Proverbs 3:5-6, 11-12 (NIV)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight.

…Do not despise the Lord’s discipline,
    and do not resent his rebuke,
because the Lord disciplines those he loves,
    as a father the son he delights in.

Today is our last reflection on the Repentance theme this week. If you’re feeling like I am, you are ready for a break from thinking of our brokenness and our need for repentance! The sad news from Florida has also deeply affected my soul. We are so very broken and I could despair. I am very ready for words such as rejoicing and resurrection, aren’t you? But what a gift we have; as people of faith, we know that the rejoicing and resurrection will come, as they have come before.

But for today we have one more gloomy word to consider: Rebuke. I would rather not think about this one! I want to think of God as one who “reminds” rather than “rebukes.” I want to imagine Jesus as a kind, warm, gentle man who laughs off my sins and loves me anyway. I am uncomfortable when I read passages such as Mark 8:33, when Jesus rebukes his dear disciple Peter by saying, “Get behind me, Satan!” Ouch!

The blessing comes when I understand how Jesus’ words of correction are spoken totally out of love for US. Jesus doesn’t rebuke to serve any of his own needs. These are not words from a demanding supervisor who needs to meet a sales quota, or a cranky teacher who wants to finish the history lesson without interruption, or an abusive parent who wants to stop us from annoying him. Jesus only wants us all to experience the joy of living as his followers. Even a loving, caring parent cannot rebuke as perfectly as Jesus does. Loving parents may discipline children with the good intention of guiding them into joyful living, too. But what brings a parent joy may not be the same for the child! Jesus rebukes us perfectly, knowing us better than we know ourselves.

Another blessing is that many Old Testament writers believed that people were physically punished by God for their sins, but now, through Jesus, we know our God to be a God of mercy and forgiveness. We are corrected, not punished (except for natural consequences) as God teaches us and reveals our sinfulness. The merciful grace of God frees us through forgiveness, but the loving grace of God perfects us through discipline. Because of Jesus, we can receive admonishment with joy and gratitude.

We feel God’s rebuke when our hearts are troubled, convicted or shamed through Bible passages, Jesus’ words and life, words from other dear ones who care for us, and through the Spirit in our own prayerful thoughts. Our sinful ways are revealed, as well as better ways to live and to be. As the verses remind us, we should consider God’s rebuke a gift. God is guiding our paths to make them straight (and joyful), because we are so deeply loved.

Consider the rebuke, “STOP DOING THAT!” How would you feel hearing those words from a supervisor? From a spouse? From a stranger? From Jesus? Note the differences in their significance and your reaction to them.

Do you remember a time when you felt God’s rebuke or a correction of a path in your life? Recall this with thankfulness. What joys resulted?

Loving God,

None of us enjoy being corrected, but thank you for your loving rebuke and discipline. We are so grateful and joyful that Jesus forgave us, but now help us to grow in perfect obedience to your will- so we may know the joy that comes in doing so. Thank you that we know every correction is only for us; only for us to discover the joy of living according to your ways.  Amen.

WEEK ONE: REPENTANCE

REND

JOEL 2:12-13 (NRSV)

“Even now,” declares the Lord,
    “return to me with all your heart,
    with fasting and weeping and mourning.”

Rend your heart
    and not your garments.
Return to the Lord your God,
    for he is gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and abounding in love,
    and he relents from sending calamity.

The Old Testament prophet Joel is warning of terrible judgment coming upon the Israelites. But “even now” at the last moment, he implores the people of God to repent, to return to their God who is “gracious and compassionate.” The God who keeps covenants and always shows mercy. The God who is “slow to anger and abounding in love.” We are blessed to have such a God- who is always for us, always merciful with us, always loving us!

Our word for today is ‘rend.’ To rend means to tear, shred or rip. Rending was a custom for the Jewish people- to intentionally rip their clothes as an expression of anger, grief or shame. In this passage, Joel encouraged the people to rend their hearts rather than just their clothing. Joel’s words for us are profound. More than the symbolic ritual of rending our clothes, the rending of our hearts is deep, painful and life-changing.

Though we are not actually physically rending our hearts, in our repentance Joel implores us to grasp and fully suffer the pain of our sinfulness. When our hearts feel torn open by grief, shredded by guilt, and ripped apart by our shame, we more fully comprehend just how much we need God’s merciful healing and forgiveness. Rending our hearts creates a raw, vulnerable, sensitive, tender and open wound in which God can really work. Our hearts also become desperate, eager and responsive for the healing touch of God’s love, mercy and guidance. And our hearts become filled with gratitude for our God who IS gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, and abounding in love!

May every wound upon our hearts create a precious opening for God’s in-pouring love and light. May every scar upon our hearts form a seal of God’s healing, forgiveness and restoration.

“Let my heart be broken by the things that break the heart of God” (~Bob Pierce). In what ways do you sense the world is breaking God’s heart today? In what ways do you sense that you are breaking God’s heart today?

In rending your heart, how might your wounds become an opening for God- an opportunity for God to work through you- to heal those heart-breaking things?

Consider the ways God has healed your heart. How might this scarred “seal of God’s healing, forgiveness and restoration” serve as a blessing for God in your life?

Gracious and compassionate God,

Help us to know the magnitude of our sin and the magnificence of your love as we rend our hearts today. Amen.

WEEK ONE: REPENTANCE

RENEGE

ROMANS 7:19 (NRSV)

For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.

I learned to play Euchre at a junior high sleepover years ago. The rules are simple but I had trouble remembering those Jacks of trump! So many times I was told that I had “reneged.” I was excused the first few times but eventually the other players grew exasperated by my mistakes. Why couldn’t I remember? I KNEW the rules.

I love Paul’s honesty in our passage for today. Paul humbly and openly admits that the sinfulness within him keeps him from doing what is right. I wanted to follow the rules and play fairly in Euchre, but I didn’t always succeed. Both Paul and I wanted to do the right thing, but in spite of this, we kept on doing what we didn’t want to do!

The Merriam Webster online dictionary defines renege as “to go back on a promise or commitment.” In this week I have already reneged on the Lenten practices I was going to do. The truth is, we all renege- every single day. As followers of Christ, we are called to follow Jesus and to obey his commandments, but we often fail. Here are just a few for us to consider…

In our daily living, do we consistently deny ourselves, pick up our cross and follow Jesus? Do we love God with all our heart, soul and mind? Do we love our neighbor as ourselves? Do we love our enemies? Do we forgive seventy times seven? Do we sell our possessions and give the money to the poor?  Do we keep awake and ready for his presence? Do we  take nothing for our journey? Do we not worry? Do we welcome little children or become like them? Do we become last and the servant of all?

We are not alone in our reneging. All through the Bible, we read of people who made promises to God but then broke them. We read of people who knew what was right but didn’t perfectly obey. God has always kept God’s covenant. God’s people were the ones who failed.

In my younger years, in times of desperation I was often tempted to bargain with God. “God, if you only would do this… then I will do that…” Now I know better than to bargain with God! I know that I will never perfectly keep my end of the deal. I’m so relieved and grateful that God’s good promises and hope for my life do not depend on my perfect obedience, only God’s complete love, mercy and unbroken covenant with me.

What promises to others have you “reneged” on in recent times- perhaps  even unintentionally- due to busyness, forgetfulness, or distraction?

Just for today, what broken commandment can you hear Jesus reminding you to try again?

As you consider God’s unfailing love and unbroken promises in your life, how would you like to thank God today?

Loving God,
Thank you for always keeping your promises to us. We have made promises to you. We have wanted to perfectly serve and obey you, but we have failed often! In fact, we know we fail every day. We are very sorry, and we ask for your forgiveness. Thank you for keeping your covenant with us in spite of our broken, imperfect selves. But help us to keep trying, and give us your power through Christ to do better. Amen.

WEEK ONE: REPENTANCE

REMOVE

MATTHEW 7:1-5 (NRSV) 

Do not judge, so that you may not be judged. For with the judgment you make you will be judged, and the measure you give will be the measure you get. Why do you see the speck in your neighbor’s eye, but do not notice the log in your own eye? Or how can you say to your neighbor, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ while the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighbor’s eye.

I have written of this before, but this passage always has me asking, “Why couldn’t Jesus just tell us to remove the speck in our own eye before we remove the speck in our neighbor’s eye? Why do I have to have a log when my neighbor only has a speck?”

Jesus is pointing out the difficulty we have in seeing our own flaws. But could Jesus also be showing us that our judgment of the faults of others reveals how much our own faults are troubling us?

In her article, “How to Be Less Critical,” Brené Brown writes,

One way to become more aware of how we judge is to understand why: We’re often motivated by a need to compare ourselves favorably with the people around us. We tend to judge others in areas where we feel most vulnerable or not good enough… In these moments, we take unconscious refuge in the thought, “At least I’m better than someone.” *

What we find annoying in others is something that annoys us in ourselves! I do this when I make excuses or blame outside factors when I am late for an appointment, but then question why another person isn’t more responsible with her time. I do this when we buy a second Christmas tree instead of donating that money to a community shelter, but then become critical of those greedy politicians. I may feel a bit uncomfortable and frivolous about the tree, but at least “I’m not as bad as they are.” My specks increase from the flaws themselves into: flaws + blame + comparison + judgment of others = logs!

Jesus doesn’t say we are only to remove our log. He invites us to remove our log in order to more clearly see the speck we are to remove in others. Imagine helping one another as beloved children of God. In humbly and honestly pointing out our own logs and how God is helping us to remove them, other dear ones might recognize and find help for their own. A speck in any eye is painful, and Jesus wants to free all of us from that pain and irritation. Jesus also knows a greater truth: as we remove our own log, the other person’s speck will no longer be such a concern to us- because we are no longer irritated by our own.

When do you find yourself most critical or judgmental?

What “speck” do you find most irritating or annoying in others?

How might God be revealing something in yourself- something God is ready to help you remove?

Loving Jesus,

So many of your words are hard for us to hear and obey, but thank you for saying them. Today, please help us to see and remove the logs of imperfection in our eyes, so that we may more clearly see others with your perfect vision of love. Amen.

*(www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/28/brene-brown-on-being-less-critical_n_5043671.html)

WEEK ONE: REPENTANCE

REPENT

Matthew 4:17 (NRSV)

From that time Jesus began to proclaim, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven has come near.”

Jesus had just spent forty days in the wilderness resisting temptation. He begins his ministry in earnest as he proclaims the kingdom of heaven has come near, instructs everyone to repent, and calls his new disciples to follow him. Repent is our word for today.

The word, “repent” means to regret or be sorry. But “repent” also means to turn away from, and more importantly, to turn to something else instead.

Lent is a time when we often “give up” certain behaviors as an act of repentance and reflection. We are helped by avoiding the situations that enable these behaviors. If we want to deny ourselves any sweets for Lent, we “turn away from them” by not buying them or having them in our homes. If we hope to tame our greed, we avoid shopping places or hide our credit cards. By eliminating or avoiding the temptations, we are more likely to succeed.

Jesus gave us his two greatest commandments: we are to love God and love one another. When he tells us to repent of our sinful ways, we recognize that our deepest, most hurtful sins are those we make in our broken relationships. But our efforts to repent of these sins are more difficult than giving up such habits as eating treats or spending money. As much as we long to obey Jesus’ words, we can’t simply “turn away” from people or avoid them! “This year, I’m giving up people for Lent.” We would be missing the whole point!

So Jesus shows us a new way to repent. In the wilderness, Jesus turns to recognize and face his temptations directly, and turns from them by turning to Scripture. When Jesus tells us to repent, he includes, “for the kingdom of heaven has come near.” He is assuring us that we have help- we have HIM, here with us!

We can’t turn FROM people, but now we have someone we can turn TO. Someone we can witness and follow. As we look to Jesus as our example and guide, we can learn how to love one another more perfectly. As we turn to Jesus for help, his Spirit will give us all we need to love God and others wholeheartedly. This Lent as we seek to repent of our sins, we can first turn to face and recognize how we are mistreating one another- and then turn to Jesus for forgiveness, wisdom, obedience and love. Lent becomes a time of repentance- as well as a time to live together, learn together, and more perfectly love together.

What sin hinders you most from loving God and loving your neighbor?

Do you recognize any certain behaviors from which Jesus may be asking you to repent?

What helpful words or actions of Jesus might you turn to and follow as you repent today?

Loving Jesus,
We are sorry for our broken, imperfect nature. Help us to repent of anything that keeps us from pleasing you. Be our example and guide especially for our relationships today! Help us to face our sinful ways and then turn from them, as we turn to you instead. Amen.

WEEK ONE: REPENTANCE

RETURN

Genesis 3:17-19 (NRSV)

By the sweat of your face
    you shall eat bread
until you return to the ground,
    for out of it you were taken;
you are dust,
    and to dust you shall return.”

Every year on Ash Wednesday, the sign of the cross is made with ashes on our foreheads. The words said are a humbling, painful reminder for us all: “You are dust, and to dust you shall return.” One day, I will be dust. You will be dust. Lent takes us to dust; Lent reminds us of our broken sinfulness and even our insignificance. We are only able to find hope in these words because we know the rest of the story.

I have an Ash Wednesday confession. I wipe the ashes from my head before I go out in public. I like to assure myself that my reason for doing so is that my penitence is personal and private. I assure myself that I can serve as a better witness of Christ through my loving acts more than by having ashes on my head.

But to be honest, I wipe the ashes off because I am embarrassed. I am concerned that I will look foolish to someone who isn’t familiar with our faith practices. I am even more concerned that someone will consider me “Christian” but not in the way I would like. For many people, the Christian image is one of hypocrisy, condemnation, exclusivity and judgment- often rightfully so. I don’t want to be seen as one who does the exact opposite of what I think Jesus would want us to do.

Upon writing that last sentence I am returned to humble dust. How many times do I do “the exact opposite of what Jesus would want us to do?” Already this morning I’m aware of two:

1. I am prideful about my image and what others think of me. Jesus suffered total humiliation and agony on the cross and yet I worry about what image the ashes on my forehead may create.
2. I am a reluctant witness. I would rather avoid questions or confrontations, than hope for opportunities for conversation, sharing and understanding.

I am not being the person Jesus calls me to be.

Return. Return… to dust. The contrast between my prideful self-image concerns and the fact that I will be returned to the ground as insignificant dust is striking. “Return” is a good word to begin this Lenten journey.

Reflection:

Are there any ways you have done the “exact opposite of what Jesus would want us to do?”

What feelings arise as you think of one day returning to dust? What causes concern? What brings gratitude?

How does the word, “return” touch your heart today?

Loving Jesus,

Today as we are reminded that we are insignificant dust, thank you for showing us that we are also your beloved friends and followers. Thank you for forgiving us every time we are not the people you have called us to be. As we begin this Lenten season, continue to reveal to us how we may grow and learn, always trusting that you love us anyway. Today we return to dust. But we also return to YOU. Thank you. Amen.

Next Wednesday, February 14th, is Ash Wednesday!

We begin the Lenten season on Ash Wednesday with the call to repentance, and end the season with the wonderful celebration of the Easter resurrection. I recently noticed that both repentance and resurrection begin with RE. In my fascination for words and patterns, I began exploring RE words that may guide our Lenten journey this year. Oh, so many lovely words were found!

Dictionary.com defines ‘re’ as “a prefix, occurring originally in loanwords from Latin, used with the meaning “again” or “again and again” to indicate repetition, or with the meaning “back” or “backward” to indicate withdrawal or backward motion.”

And certainly Lent is a time of acknowledging and grieving our sinfulness (which we seem to do “again and again”); of repeating our fasts or other spiritual practices; of trying again and again to grow as followers of Christ. Lent is also a time to look backward on our past mistakes; to look again at the life of Jesus along with his ways and teachings; and a time to withdraw from the things that keep us from deepening in him.

This Lent, we will have a weekly theme with daily RE words to consider, along with a short devotion. (Sundays will be my Sabbath rest from writing.) It is my prayer that these words and devotions will faithfully and beautifully bless your ever-deepening relationship with Jesus Christ.