Simply Soul Searching

Romans 15:7 (NRSV)

Welcome one another, therefore, just as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God.

Philippians 2:2-4 (NRSV)

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others. 

I generally smile and wave to the drivers and neighbors I encounter when I walk. This is a practice I adopted from a friend who told me that she always waves to anyone who comes down her street. She explained that the person passing by is usually a neighbor, and if not, she believes she helps to make her neighborhood a friendlier place for everyone. I liked her idea and have made it my practice, too.

When we were new to this neighborhood, I felt a little uncomfortable waving because every person I encountered was a stranger to me. But most people would smile and wave back, and over time, I noticed that often they were waving at me first! They began to recognize me as their neighbor. They were no longer just responding to my initial greeting but actually wanting to greet me as well. These little mutual greetings have come to mean so much to me. My neighborhood does feel like a friendlier place.

There is something special about a wave, isn’t there? Even among strangers, a wave becomes the friendly gesture that we notice each other, we acknowledge each other’s presence, and we wish them well. The folks in my community may know nothing of me (except that I walk a lot 😀 ) but each of us recognizes the other as a neighbor and potential friend. They do not know my political leanings, my religious affiliations, or my stances on social issues. I do not know theirs. We may have nothing else in common, but we see an underlying goodness in one another, connected as human beings who share the same community.

I think we need to wave more than tweet.

A few years ago I started a Twitter account in order to share my blogs, but I have avoided Twitter in recent times. There are so many political tweets and most of them are upsetting and discouraging. These vindictive and divisive tweets intend to inflame, rile and huddle together those who are on the same political side, while angering and pushing away those on the other. Political tweets are often used as weapons to further divide us, instead of teachable tools that could unite us. These political tweets will never change hearts or minds, but only further divide and alienate us from one another.

This type of tweet seems like the exact opposite of a wave.

A wave signals, “I acknowledge you,” while a ranting tweet declares, “I don’t care what you think, I’m right and you’re wrong.” A wave shows that we recognize one another as connected beings, even when a person is on the other side of the street. A vicious tweet shows that we will remain separated by our differences and there is no desire to change that. A wave is a mutual greeting of friendship, while a tweet is like a one-sided, palm-out gesture to keep away.

We do not have to follow suit. We can set a different example. We can be the “wavers” instead of the “tweeters.” We can look for the things that unite us- and I believe there are so many more than the things that separate us. We can connect in some small way even when we are on “the opposite sides of the street.” We can work to find our commonality instead of what differentiates us. We can try to find our common ground and use that as a foundation to build from there. We can wish one another well instead of pushing each other away. We can see people as fellow neighbors instead of unseen enemies on social media.

My friends, consider this post as my wave to all of you. That I see you as a human beings and I value your existence, no matter what you believe or where you are in the world.

We can continue to hurl tweets, memes, or Facebook posts (or bombs, for that matter) that claim, “We are better than YOU!”

Or we can come together and say, “We are better than THIS.”

Clipart image from thenounproject.com (free images)

Romans 12:2 (NRSV)

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God—what is good and acceptable and perfect.

I’m chuckling about this now, but when I chose the word awaken as my guiding word for this year, I envisioned myself as a gentle earth mother who has spiritually awakened and walks deeply and contemplatively through life. Instead, God seems to be leading me to awaken in a different way- to a greater awareness of the injustices and troubles around me- which has awakened my heartbreak and even outrage at times.

Earlier this month, Jim was invited to speak with other clergy at a press conference on behalf of Fairness, WV. This organization is working to pass a bill that would add sexual orientation and gender identity to the state’s housing and employment non-discrimination statutes. Because Jim believes in and advocates for equal rights and justice for all LGTBQ people, he was delighted to have the opportunity to speak. He was then invited to join the Fairness WV team! We are excited to help where we can.

But now we are becoming more aware of all the obstacles ahead. Now I am hearing more of those hateful remarks, uninformed judgments, outright lies, and over-exaggerated fears, from folks who have incomplete or immature understandings of the Bible, sexual orientation, and gender identity. Hearing people say these things about the dear, good people I know and love sickens me to my core. I have been aware of these issues for quite some time and worked for inclusion and equality in the Lutheran church years ago, but hearing these accusations anew has been painful.

I’m sad that the objectors of the Fairness Act claim that their faith is what they are upholding, when I believe that it is fear. I’m sad that they believe God would judge them for treating everyone fairly and equally while withholding their own personal judgments of others. I’m sad that they don’t feel the love of our God who loves us all, commands us to love everyone, and tells us to treat others as we would treat ourselves (one can find these verses in the Bible beyond Leviticus).

We- myself included- are tempted to close our minds to that which makes us uncomfortable. We come to just enough understanding about an issue so that we feel either justified or affirmed, and then we have no desire to learn anything more. We stagnate happily in our “rightness” because learning something new or different might make us uncomfortable again. I do this with opposing political views. I generally read articles that support my position instead of learning more about other viewpoints. If anything, reading the opposite view may give me a better understanding and starting point for future conversations. We may be content in our stagnation, but when we use our closed and misinformed minds to divide or judge others, we are compounding the wrongs in our world.

• If one truly wants to use the Bible as a source of authority on this issue, one must understand what the Bible really says about sexual behaviors. One must take the time to read insights from scholars, research the culture of the time, learn how the Bible was assembled, and study scientific evidence about sexual orientation. We cannot stop short once we read a few verses which seem to uphold our judgment against others. There are SO many other verses that contradict these.
• If one truly wants to claim a right to religious freedom, one must also uphold all of the Constitution and its amendments. We cannot stop short once we read the First Amendment alone, but also read and apply the equal protection clause in the 14th Amendment:

All persons born or naturalized in the United States and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

We all must keep learning and growing in our understanding of issues- and of one another. This awakening has been difficult, but it doesn’t compare to the challenges and injustices our LGTBQ family members and friends have endured. Then there are the many others who are also suffering, held captive by injustice. Jesus tells us to help ALL of the oppressed- the widows, orphans, refugees, immigrants, poor, imprisoned, sick, suffering, people of color, and any who are marginalized. We have much to do.

May I continue to be awake and aware, may I continue to learn and grow, and may I continue to be heartbroken and angry about the unjust ways we treat others. Most of all, may I continue advocating for justice, equality and relief for all who are marginalized while growing in my understanding of the issues we face. My words and actions may not enlighten the closed-minded. But may my words and actions help others to know that they are loved, that they are not alone, and that there are friends who will advocate, support and journey with them. Just like God does.

Awaken me, God, to all that I must see, to all that I must learn, to all that I must do. Amen.

Photo credit: taken from napavalleykid.com

John 4:5-10 (NRSV)

(Jesus) came to a Samaritan city called Sychar, near the plot of ground that Jacob had given to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there, and Jesus, tired out by his journey, was sitting by the well. It was about noon.

A Samaritan woman came to draw water, and Jesus said to her, “Give me a drink.” (His disciples had gone to the city to buy food.) The Samaritan woman said to him, “How is it that you, a Jew, ask a drink of me, a woman of Samaria?” (Jews do not share things in common with Samaritans.) Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to you, ‘Give me a drink,’ you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water.” 

When I was serving as a youth director in an urban church years ago, there was a gentleman who walked across the church parking lot almost daily. It seemed this was a shortcut for his walk to the liquor store. Each day I would see him make the return trip home, a brown bag concealing his bottle. Eventually I began to chat with him and I learned his name was James.

One day, James shared that his wife was quite ill, and the medical expenses were making life very difficult for them. So I offered him a grocery store gift card to help pay for some necessities. My offering seemed to release a flood of pain and guilt, and his story began pouring out.

“You know, I drink quite a bit.”

I simply nodded my awareness, reassuring him that I still wanted to help.

“I really do believe in God, I just don’t go to church.”

I sincerely told him that I believed he did have faith, and I could also understand his reluctance about going to church.

“You know, I always thought this was a white-people’s church.”

Laughing, I replied that I understood why he thought this. The church I served was home to over 300 white people… and two black women.

We talked a bit longer about God and faith before he went on his way.

A few weeks later the snow had begun to fall quite heavily. I was heading to my van after work when I came upon James and his two young grandsons. He offered to clear the snow from my van windows. I wanted to decline his offer, to convey that my gift had been given with no strings attached. But I felt the spirit whispering to me, “Let him bless YOU now.” And so I did- and he and the two boys carefully and thoroughly cleaned all of my windows.

As they stepped back with smiles, admiring their work, I thanked them with my whole heart. I thanked God, too. I thought of Jesus, who revealed his true self for the first time to the Samaritan woman drawing water. First he asked her for something he needed, a drink of water from the well. His request helped her understand that she was of value to him, that he needed her help- before he would tell her who he was and what he had to offer her!

My times with James provided lessons on love for me. I came away with a deeper awareness that everyone needs to be loved, accepted and heard- as is. Each of us needs that genuine love in which we are able to tell our story with no qualifiers, and to be heard with no judgment. To care and share in mutual respect. Not to be looked down on, nor even looked up to, but to be greeted as equal partners in the world. We need one another. We all have something to give… and we all have something to receive.

In her book, Wisdom Jesus, Cynthia Bourgeault says,

One of the most familiar of Jesus’ teachings is “Love your neighbor as yourself.” But we almost always hear that wrong. We hear, “Love your neighbor as much as yourself.” If you listen closely to Jesus’ teaching, however, there is no “as much as” in there. It’s just “Love your neighbor as yourself”- as a continuation of your very own being. 

It’s a complete seeing that your neighbor is you.¹

¹Bourgeault, Cynthia. Wisdom Jesus. Massachusetts: Shambala Publications, Inc, 2008.

Photo by Bruno Kelzer on Unsplash (Thank you!)

WHAT WILL BE YOUR WORD?

Years ago I learned of a New Year practice of choosing one word as a guide for the year ahead. The idea is to allow a word to come to you that will serve as your focus for the year. This is done by praying, reflecting, thinking of our heart’s desire or a way in which we would like to grow, or noticing when a word seems to resonate with us on a deeper level. You can find many helpful resources and ideas about this practice online, but today I want to share some of the ways I have been blessed. I have now done this for several years, and each year I receive new gifts from my word.

Several times I have chosen a word to guide my thoughts and energies, and then found that the word was perfect- but in a different way than I anticipated. The year I chose the word, “breathe,” my reason was to let go of achieving, to slow my pace and to be mindfully present. This ended up being the year I went through cancer treatments, and the word reminded me to simply breathe and allow my body to cope and heal. The year I chose “embrace,” my sister Janet invited me to accompany her on a trip to New York City. NYC seemed intimidating to me, but I decided it was time to embrace this experience with her. What a rich blessing this was!

This year my word was “attend.” My intention was to be more present, to be attentive to God’s movement, and to pay attention to self care. Once again, in my year-end reflection I was surprised to see how this word impacted my life in new and unexpected ways. The word had moved me to make some courageous life changes that helped uplift my spirit and honor my integrity. Also, a few months ago, I started listening to podcasts instead of music when I walked. Now I see that through these, I have attended numerous interesting and insightful talks that have taught and inspired me!

This coming year, my word will be “awaken.” The word actually came to me this summer as I was journaling. When I wrote the word, something in my soul stirred. I wonder in what new ways I will awaken this year?

What will be your word for 2020? God bless your discernment! (I would love to know what word you choose, if you don’t mind sharing in the comments!)

Photo by Romain Vignes on Unsplash