Simply Soul Searching
HOW IS GOD LOVING ME – AND WHERE IS GOD LEADING ME?
inSIGNIFICANCE
This past Sunday, Pastor Michael used Jesus’ parable of the mustard seed to remind us that God’s kingdom matures in God’s time and through God’s provision. Just as the tiny mustard seed can grow into a tall tree, God can use the smallest acts of faith to further God’s kingdom. As an example, he spoke of our community garden. This past spring, our Sunday school children planted tomato, yellow squash, and green pepper seeds to grow produce for our community food pantry. Through this garden, we hope to bless those in need with fresh vegetables later this summer.
Pastor Michael went on to say that this garden is one example of God’s kingdom coming in God’s time. Months ago, Tom had shared his idea of a community garden with Pastor Mike, but there were a few issues with getting the garden started. Now, these months later, that garden had come to fruition because of a Sunday school lesson and the inspiration that followed.
I smiled sheepishly at my dear Jim, thankful that he loves his whiny wife. Because earlier that morning, I had been grousing about filling water jugs, watering the plants, and keeping watch over the weeds and growing vegetables. As Sunday school coordinator, I have had the oversight of the garden. Jim knows that gardening is not one of my “spiritual gifts.”
The truth is, I have had very little responsibility for the garden. I am so very grateful for those who willingly bore the more difficult work. Dick built the wooden frames. He and Rita completed the exhausting task of filling them with soil. Coni, Tim, Kathy, and other anonymous volunteers help maintain the garden along with the Sunday school children. My role is so insignificant. Usually I don’t mind these tasks, but after a busy week, I was feeling resentful.
As I listened to Pastor Michael’s words, I was ashamed but also inspired. To discover that what I had considered trivial and mundane tasks were part of God’s larger kingdom helped me to see their significance. To hear that these tasks were an answer to prayer gave me a divine purpose for my work. To be reminded that the produce will bless those in need with good food made me ashamed that I had been resentful; I, who am so abundantly blessed but often take my plentiful meals for granted. Is it so much for God to ask me to water or weed twice a week?
We must never forget how our most insignificant tasks, those we consider minutia, the chores we even resent at times, can all be part of a greater good. And perhaps we should be more willing and available to stretch a bit, to take on a task we’d “rather not do” – for that task might just be a divine appointment that has come our way.
The idea that I am serving a greater good, a higher purpose, an answer to prayer, and a fulfillment of kingdom living, makes filling water jugs and checking the garden such a small role to play. Today I thank God for yet another humbling moment; a reminder of my short-sighted pettiness- and God’s incredible goodness.
Pastor Michael’s sermon message may be viewed at St. John United Methodist’s website: sjumcwv.org. “The Seeds of Innovation“
Adjusting Our Lenses
When Jim and I planned to move to West Virginia, we looked online at houses to rent. We found a cute bungalow that seemed perfect for us, as we looked at the pictures of quaint rooms and a nice yard. The next time we visited the area, we drove by “our” house. The house may have been cute, but it was nestled between two dilapidated buildings with construction all around. The pictures didn’t show us the whole story!
Good photographers know how to adjust their camera lenses according to the “story” they hope to convey. With their artistry, they are able to offer us an image of perfect beauty, tell a realistic story of life, capture an exquisite moment, or offer a close-up view and perspective on ordinary subjects.
I’m thinking that our faith helps us to adjust our lenses in order to capture the best parts of our everyday lives. God guides our aperture so that we can let in more light, focus on the beauty, or see a truer, clearer vision of our moments.
When we become overwhelmed, discouraged or downhearted by the picture of our life before us, we can use our faith-lens to ‘zoom in’ on unexpected treasures while cropping the dismal or daunting background. Find the lesson learned in a difficult time. Look to the caring friend who comforts us in our sorrow. Revisit a treasured memory amid a mundane routine. Enjoy a good laugh at our mistakes. Notice a revelation of God’s love at an unexpected moment. Our lens can help us more clearly see the individual blessings tucked within the larger picture.
Or we can use our lens to ‘zoom out’ our focus to encompass a more complete and realistic story when we need to be mindful. Learn the compelling background that helps us understand a person’s behavior. Envision the infinite glorious eternal life when enduring a day of grief or pain. Take in a wider vision that includes others when we are too focused on ourselves. Review the past moments of God’s love in our lives when we are fearful about today. Our lens can help us back away from the narrow vision of our troubles or ourselves to see our potential in God’s greater picture.
God has the eye of an artist. God adjusts our lenses to draw our focus on the light amid the darkness, the lovely amid the ordinary, and the truth amid the pretense. God helps us to notice and record what God would want us to observe and to share, as we keep snapshots of moments in our memory. With God helping us to focus where we should, we can find the hope, the joy, and the proper perspective for each day of our lives.
Life’s Little Annoyances
(I shared this with my Facebook friends… thought my blog readers might appreciate reading this, too!)
There was a strong breeze on my walk this afternoon. I was becoming slightly annoyed that my hair kept blowing in my face, until I thought, “Wait… my HAIR is annoying me!”
My hair is finally long enough to annoy me after losing it to chemo three years ago. Suddenly I was grateful for this “annoyance” and grateful I am alive to be annoyed! I’m thanking God for all of life’s little annoyances today.
Still working on mosquitoes. 
Bird vs. Karen
Last week I found a pile of dried grass and twigs on our front porch. Looking up, I could see where a bird had attempted to build a nest on our porch light. The lamp does not have a flat base so most of the grass had fallen through. I pulled the few remaining grasses off the lamp and swept the pile away.
Since then, each morning I find more grass on the porch with just a few straggles left on the lamp. Had the bird tried to build the nest on a window sill or our back porch light, I wouldn’t have been as concerned. Our entryway is just not a good place for the nest, so I have been sweeping and removing all week. And every day, the silly bird comes back!
I have gone from admiring the bird’s beautiful perseverance to shaking my head at the bird’s stubborn foolishness. When does perseverance become a stubborn, silly struggle in futility? This morning I wanted to ask the bird, “Do you realize how foolish you are being, how futile this is?”
Then I realized that the bird could ask me the very same question! 😀
A Rusty Washer (or Three)
On my regular walking path I have noticed a small rusted washer on the pavement for quite some time. A few days ago, I was prompted to pick it up. Although I am one to pick up pennies, I didn’t have any reason for choosing this washer. But I had been listening to Harry Chapin’s music in recent weeks, and his song, “All My Life’s a Circle” has been in my heart. So I felt that maybe God was using this washer to remind me that my life IS a circle- of “sunrises and sundowns,” seasons and years, beginnings and endings, and even deaths and resurrections.
In addition, since last Sunday Pr. Michael’s message has been “circling” in my thoughts and heart. Our Bible passage was from Luke 24, in which we learn how the disciples were lost, disappointed and confused; all of their hopes and dreams for Jesus to redeem the people of Israel seemed to have died with Jesus. Pr. Michael explained, “With Jesus’ death, all hope for redemption was lost and Jesus’ followers were forced to redefine redemption and their role in God’s kingdom.” These words have resonated with me. How often do we endure a death of some kind? And following that death, how often do we need to “redefine redemption and our role in God’s kingdom?”
In our daily living, we will encounter deaths quite often. Not only will we endure deaths of precious loved ones, but we also experience the deaths of our dreams, careers, expectations, health, relationships, youth… With each painful death comes grief and heartache. However, God continually brings us full circle by redeeming and resurrecting new life after each death. With each new life, we find a deeper meaning of redemption and resurrection, and we learn to redefine our roles in God’s kingdom as well.
Pastor Michael later told me, “I believe that redemption and our role in God’s kingdom is a never ending process. However, sometimes we make it a one time event and leave it there. Exciting to think that we serve a God who continually molds and shapes (redeems) us for greater work in the Kingdom!” Yes! The circle always keeps going…
After I had finally plucked that washer from the pavement, I was surprised to find a smaller one the next day- in nearly the same place! The message for me seemed to be that we are always redeemed and resurrected but perhaps not for the reasons we think we are. We have been given new life- but we find it is not the one we anticipated or are accustomed to living. Sometimes our roles are diminished. I was resurrected after my time with cancer, but I wasn’t able to continue the ministry I had relished. I have found new life here in West Virginia, serving others where I can and helping in smaller ministry roles.
My blog was going to end here. But today I found this large “washer” type disc! Once again God surprised me with an additional message. Sometimes our redemption and role in God’s kingdom is more than we could ever dream or imagine! Jesus was resurrected but he wasn’t the same. With his new life he was able to give us his Spirit and equip us to do even greater works than he (John 14:12).
“All My Life’s a Circle…” In all of our seasons and circles of life, God is redeeming and resurrecting us to new life and new roles in God’s kingdom. Every winter circles back to spring because of God’s redeeming love. Every dark night circles back to the light of a fresh, new morning because of God’s restorative grace. Every painful death circles forward to new life because of God’s resurrecting power.
The lesson for me in these rusty washers is this. After every death and resurrection, my newly redeemed and resurrected life may not- no, will not- look the same. But as I redefine my new role in God’s kingdom, may my only wish be that I live and serve in the ways that are most useful to God. May my new life be less about what I do, and more about what God can do through me, no matter the size of my role.
What size washer might I find tomorrow? I imagine it will be the perfect size for me. 🙂
READERS: Thank you! Monday, April 2nd
My Dear Readers,
Thank you so much for reading these Lenten devotions. I’m humbled that you have taken the time to read them. It has been my prayer that you have been enriched or blessed in some small way this season. Thank you for encouraging me along the way! You helped me so much, more than you can know.
I have another writing assignment for Christ in Our Home due in a few months, and I also hope to finish up my book. While I focus on these projects I may not blog as often, but I hope you check in once in a while. May I ask for your prayers? Please ask that God will help me to surrender my own ego or agenda and that God may freely inspire and move; that my writing will bless God and those who read and reflect. Thank you, so much.
May we all live in the joy and the freedom of the Resurrection! Love and thanks to all of you.
Karen 🙂
RESURRECTION! Easter Sunday, April 1st
DAY ONE: REBIRTH
RESURRECTION!
Luke 24:1-12 (NRSV)
But on the first day of the week, at early dawn, they came to the tomb, taking the spices that they had prepared. They found the stone rolled away from the tomb, but when they went in, they did not find the body. While they were perplexed about this, suddenly two men in dazzling clothes stood beside them. The women were terrified and bowed their faces to the ground, but the men said to them, “Why do you look for the living among the dead? He is not here, but has risen. Remember how he told you, while he was still in Galilee, that the Son of Man must be handed over to sinners, and be crucified, and on the third day rise again.” Then they remembered his words, and returning from the tomb, they told all this to the eleven and to all the rest. Now it was Mary Magdalene, Joanna, Mary the mother of James, and the other women with them who told this to the apostles. But these words seemed to them an idle tale, and they did not believe them. But Peter got up and ran to the tomb; stooping and looking in, he saw the linen cloths by themselves; then he went home, amazed at what had happened.
And then on this one glorious morning, everything changes! Jesus has risen from the dead! He is alive! He is alive forever! Now we will be, too! There is new life all around!
We have so much to celebrate. Jesus’ resurrection is so much more than our eternal life after we die. His resurrection assures us that this is Day One of a brand new beginning- here and now! God has dramatically shown us through Jesus that God overcomes EVERYTHING. Even death. We no longer have any reason to fear any hardship this world may give us. We are gloriously resurrected with each new morning.
Release would be another good word for today. Jesus is totally free- released from his burial clothing, released from the stone that sealed him in, released from the dark tomb, and released from death! Jesus has been released to live in new freedom. Think of how his release is also our freedom! Because of Jesus’ resurrection, we are released from all of our limited confines of life.
Jesus’ resurrection releases us from…
The grave clothes that bind and suffocate us. Are there parts of your life that feel binding or suffocating? Jesus can help free us from the wrappings and the trappings of those ways of living- perhaps habits, routines, traditions, expectations, or obligations- that are no longer practical, useful, or enjoyable.
The stony obstacles that block our way. Are there hurdles that have been blocking your progress? What is preventing you from moving forward? Jesus can free us from being immobilized by offering us alternate routes, helping us to remove the obstacles that are before us, and sometimes showing us the obstacles within us- such as stubbornness, insecurity, lack of innovation, or lack of insight.
The dark tomb that confines us. Are there limitations or uncertainties that confine you in darkness? In what way do you feel boxed in, unable to see the light? What parts of your soul are darkened with despair, worry, or sorrow? Jesus can free us from our own imprisonment by opening new doors, shining his light into our darkness, and revealing our way out.
The deaths that stand before us. What losses or deaths do you fear most? Jesus can free us from our fears because he has overcome the world. He has overcome death. Nothing can separate us from the love of Christ (Romans 8:38-39), and we can face death directly, without fear. Jesus says to death and loss, “You have no say in this. You have no power over us. We are passing you by.”
It IS a new day. Because of this wonderful Resurrection of Jesus, we are given brand new beginnings with every new day, every new moment. We are FREE; fully FREE! Can you feel the freedom? How will you live NOW? This is Day One of your new life. Thank Jesus. Thank God. And LIVE in Resurrected joy!
God of the Resurrection,
You have brought life out of death in the Resurrection of your Son, Jesus. You have brought us out of the dark tomb into the light of your everlasting love. THANK YOU! Our hearts are filled with joy and gratitude. Beginning with this new day- Day One- help us to live our lives fully free in Resurrected joy! Amen.
REMAIN: Saturday, March 31st
HOLY WEEK: RECOLLECTION
REMAIN
Luke 23: 50-56 (NRSV)
Now there was a good and righteous man named Joseph, who, though a member of the council, had not agreed to their plan and action. He came from the Jewish town of Arimathea, and he was waiting expectantly for the kingdom of God. This man went to Pilate and asked for the body of Jesus. Then he took it down, wrapped it in a linen cloth, and laid it in a rock-hewn tomb where no one had ever been laid. It was the day of Preparation, and the sabbath was beginning. The women who had come with him from Galilee followed, and they saw the tomb and how his body was laid. Then they returned, and prepared spices and ointments.
On the sabbath they rested according to the commandment.
And now we wait…
We are so fortunate to be living on the other side of Jesus’ resurrection, aren’t we? Can you imagine how sad, confused, angry, lost, and despairing Jesus’ followers, family and friends must have felt on that Sabbath? There must have been SO many questions, so many doubts, so many emotions, so many fears. We can imagine them being anxious to reassure and comfort one another, figure out new plans, or perhaps even flee. But it was the Sabbath, and they were to rest. They had to remain with their broken dreams, their private grief, and their unanswered questions…
Was this all for nothing? Was Jesus who he claimed to be? Were we misled? Did I miss something? What do I do now? Where did we go wrong? Who is to blame for this terrible ending? Why did Jesus not save himself? Where is our Messiah? Will I be the next to die? That Sabbath was filled with the anxious uncertainty of many unanswered questions.
No one was able to know what was going on inside of the dark tomb that day. There was a huge stone covering the opening. Everyone remained in Sabbath quiet rest, away from the burial garden. Silence and sorrow prevailed.
Our word for today is Remain. There are times when we must simply remain with the question before us. An answer hasn’t come or isn’t clear. And when the question is one that makes us uncertain, uncomfortable, or anxious, we don’t remain with the silence very well. We want answers. We want to find reasons. We want to locate someone who can help. We want to resolve issues. We want to know what next steps to take. We want clarity. We want to figure out a plan. We want to move on. We want our lives to make sense.
Our times of uncertainty and unanswered questions can feel like the anxious waiting outside that dark, closed tomb. But in these silent waiting times, God is still at work- especially at work- within us. We need to remain with the question until we have learned what it holds for us. We need to remain outside the tomb, while God is transforming and resurrecting new life in the answer that as yet lies hidden inside the darkness. We need to remain… and we need to allow God to be God.
Today we are to remain before the silence of the quiet tomb. Today we are to remain before the silence of unanswered questions. But we remain with hope in our hearts. We KNOW the glorious answer that will soon emerge from the darkness. We are living on the other side of the Resurrection!
Transforming God,
Today we wait before the quiet, dark tomb. We wait for your glorious work to be revealed in Jesus’ resurrection. Today we wait before the quiet, dark of our own unanswered questions. We wait for your glorious work to be revealed in us. Thank you that we can wait with hope. Amen.
(I have always loved this quote… I hope it speaks to you today.)
“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.”
~ Rainer Maria Rilke
RECALL: Friday, March 30th
HOLY WEEK: RECOLLECTION
RECALL
Luke 23: 32-46 (NRSV)
Two others also, who were criminals, were led away to be put to death with him. When they came to the place that is called The Skull, they crucified Jesus there with the criminals, one on his right and one on his left. Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing.” And they cast lots to divide his clothing. And the people stood by, watching; but the leaders scoffed at him, saying, “He saved others; let him save himself if he is the Messiah of God, his chosen one!” The soldiers also mocked him, coming up and offering him sour wine, and saying, “If you are the King of the Jews, save yourself!” There was also an inscription over him, “This is the King of the Jews.”
One of the criminals who were hanged there kept deriding him and saying, “Are you not the Messiah? Save yourself and us!” But the other rebuked him, saying, “Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed have been condemned justly, for we are getting what we deserve for our deeds, but this man has done nothing wrong.” Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” He replied, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in Paradise.”
It was now about noon, and darkness came over the whole land until three in the afternoon, while the sun’s light failed; and the curtain of the temple was torn in two. Then Jesus, crying with a loud voice, said, “Father, into your hands I commend my spirit.” Having said this, he breathed his last.
Good Friday. Today is the day for us to recall that terrible, final day of Jesus’ earthly life. We cannot fathom Jesus’ pain, suffering, anguish, humiliation, torment, ridicule, and his slow, tortuous death on the cross. Jesus only wanted to give us life and love, and this is what we did to him. May we all take some quiet time today to recall all of this, to grieve and to despair again, with very sorry and very thankful hearts.
Our word for this Good Friday is Recall. Merriam Webster defines recall in these ways: to remember (something) from the past; to ask or order (someone) to return; or to ask people to return (a product with a defect or problem). Let’s consider all three meanings today.
To remember from the past…
We recall that day with great sadness. But we recall these words of Jesus with thankfulness, deep relief, and greater peace: “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”* His words are difficult to believe- that Jesus would do this at all, and that Jesus has done this for us. WE ARE FORGIVEN. There is nothing we can do to merit our forgiveness. This is a gift of complete mercy and grace.
To ask someone to return…
Every day Jesus is recalling us back as his followers. In what ways have we been negligent of Jesus recently? What gifts of God have we been taking for granted? In what new ways might we grow in our discipleship? Jesus asks us always to return to him. In this week of recollection, let’s return to him by revisiting the Good Friday story in the context of his love. Let’s return to him by re-membering him each day with our life and love. Let’s return to him by being attentive and ready with open and thankful hearts, as he recalls us anew each day.
To ask people to return a product with a problem or defect…
Finally, Jesus is recalling us back to the cross. He is asking us to return to him with our own brokenness- our problems and defects. We are imperfect. We need to hear his words of forgiveness once again. Jesus wants to restore us and make us new. On this Good Friday Jesus is also recalling us back to the cross so that we may die to ourselves once again. Let’s go to the cross and surrender. Let’s go to the cross and allow Jesus to keep working in us, perfecting us and completing us, removing every defect. Today is the day.
Loving, merciful Jesus,
Oh, how you love us! On this terrible and Good Friday, we recall your immense suffering and death on the cross, with great sadness and guilt. But we also recall your words of mercy and forgiveness, with great hope and peace. We hear you recalling us today to be your devoted followers. We hear you recalling us back to the cross for surrendering and perfecting. We hear your call. Help us to heed your call. Amen.
(*As I was preparing this devotion, I noticed that the verse, “Father forgive them…” was enclosed within brackets. I learned that these words of Jesus were not included in the original manuscript of Luke, and may have been added later. They also may have at one time been removed by ones who didn’t want to excuse Jesus’ killers. I found several online discussions about this! Did Jesus actually say this? WOULD Jesus have said this? But as we did earlier this week, if we revisit this story in the context of Jesus’ life, love, and his commands to forgive one another, I believe Jesus surely could have said these words, don’t you?)
REMEMBER: Thursday, March 29th
HOLY WEEK: RECOLLECTION
REMEMBER
Luke 22: 14-20 (NRSV)
When the hour came, he took his place at the table, and the apostles with him. He said to them, “I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer; for I tell you, I will not eat it until it is fulfilled in the kingdom of God.” Then he took a cup, and after giving thanks he said, “Take this and divide it among yourselves; for I tell you that from now on I will not drink of the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes.” Then he took a loaf of bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body, which is given for you. Do this in remembrance of me.” And he did the same with the cup after supper, saying, “This cup that is poured out for you is the new covenant in my blood.
On the last Passover before his death, Jesus shared bread and wine with his disciples. In a solemn and intimate moment, he broke the bread, called it his body, and described it as given for them. He then poured wine, called it the new covenant in his blood, and described it as poured out for them. Jesus told the disciples that whenever they shared this Passover meal of bread and wine, they should remember him. This has become our precious sacrament of Holy Communion.
There are many interpretations of what the bread and wine actually represent in the Christian church. The bread and wine can be understood as symbols of Jesus’ body and blood, or as his actual body and blood, or as a divine mystery where Jesus is present through the Spirit. No matter what we believe about the bread and wine, I hope we can all agree that in Holy Communion, we are to remember Jesus and to know that he is present with us. Remember is our word for this Maundy Thursday. Remember encompasses the meaning of this sacrament beautifully, for several reasons.
When Jesus commands us to remember him, we are to bring his presence to mind when we share this meal. We are to remember the wonderful difference his life, death and resurrection have made for us. We are to remember his commandments to love God and to love one another. We are to remember his teachings and his way of living as our own life’s example. When we share in the bread and wine, we are to remember his last Passover meal. As we remember Jesus this way, the sacrament gives us the gifts of gratitude and grace found in the life, forgiveness, and love of Jesus.
In addition, the word, “member” is defined as part of a whole. So “re-membering” would mean putting the members back together as a whole. In Holy Communion, we remember how Jesus’ body was broken, through his terrible suffering and death. But we also gratefully understand how his body was re-membered in his resurrection! He was restored and made whole. As we remember Jesus this way, the sacrament gives us the hope and joy of our own eternal re-membering when that glorious day comes for us.
~ When I had cancer, Holy Communion became a very significant part of my peace and inner healing. I felt the broken body of Jesus being united with my broken body as I had the bread and wine. I remembered how he was then restored; yes, in a new and different way- but a better way; a resurrected way. I knew that no matter what happened to me, because of Jesus I would also be resurrected in a new way. This sacrament is a healing gift for all of us in our brokenness. We can trust that in all circumstances, we will be re-membered; because of him, we will be put back together in a new and better way.
Finally, because of Jesus’ gift of the Holy Spirit, we all are called and equipped to serve as his body, the Body of Christ in the world. When we gather together at the table, we are re-membering the Body of Christ through our unity, our fellowship, and our service together. In Holy Communion, we become the Body of Christ together, restored and whole. We gather and we re-member Jesus by living as his complete body in the world. As we re-member Jesus this way, the sacrament gives us our purpose and power for living.
Our Jesus,
Oh, how you have loved us! We once again are reminded of the anguish and agony you endured as you followed the path to the cross. Help us to remember and to re-member you in all the ways that you would have us do so. Thank you for sharing this meal with us. Thank you for sharing yourself with us. We are so very grateful. Amen.
Simply Soul Searching 