Simply Soul Searching
HOW IS GOD LOVING ME – AND WHERE IS GOD LEADING ME?
A PICTURE AND A POEM: SHADOW
FOR THIS DAY
(GOOD FRIDAY)
Light increasing
Days lengthening
Darkness waning
Shadow remaining.
Cardinals singing
Buds revealing
Nestlings peeping
Silence keeping.
Hope warming
Peace softening
Love surrounding
Grief abounding.
Tomb opening
Life emerging
Joy unfolding
Cross beholding…
(Photo by Karen)
WALKING THROUGH HOLY WEEK
(Thanks to Prince of Peace Lutheran Church, Roseville, MN for the image.)
I tried this Holy Week nature walk a few days ago, and found it be a reflective, unique way to remember the incredible stories of the week. I was surprised that I could find something appropriate for each of the descriptions listed. This walk was yet another reminder that when we pay attention, we can find God everywhere, always revealing love. Here are the photos; I put them in order of the biblical narrative.
Mark 11:8 Many people spread their cloaks on the road, and others spread leafy branches that they had cut in the fields. (a leafy branch)
Mark 14:3 While he was at Bethany in the house of Simon the leper, as he sat at the table, a woman came with an alabaster jar of very costly ointment of nard, and she broke open the jar and poured the ointment on his head. (something broken)
Mark 14:17 When it was evening, he came with the twelve. (twelve of something – two are close together)
Luke 22:14 When the hour came, he took his place at the table, and the apostles with him. (a table)
John 13:5 Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel that was tied around him. (water)
John 13:34 I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. (a heart)
Mark 15:17 And they clothed him in a purple cloak, and after twisting some thorns into a crown they put it on him. (something thorny)
John 19:5 So Jesus came out wearing the crown of thorns and the purple robe. Pilate said to them, “Behold the man!” (something purple)
Mark 15:21 They compelled a passer-by, who was coming in from the country, to carry his cross; it was Simon of Cyrene, the father of Alexander and Rufus. (a cross)
Mark 15:46 Then Joseph bought a linen cloth and, taking down the body, wrapped it in the linen cloth and laid it in a tomb that had been hewn out of rock. He then rolled a stone against the door of the tomb. (a stone)
John 19:40 They took the body of Jesus and wrapped it with the spices in linen cloths, according to the burial custom of the Jews. (a sweet scent)
Mark 14:72 At that moment the cock crowed for the second time. Then Peter remembered that Jesus had said to him, “Before the cock crows twice, you will deny me three times.” And he broke down and wept. (the sound of a bird)
Mark 16:6 But he said to them, “Do not be alarmed; you are looking for Jesus of Nazareth, who was crucified. He has been raised; he is not here. Look, there is the place they laid him. (something empty)
Luke 24:5 The women were terrified and bowed their faces to the ground, but the men said to them, “Why do you look for the living among the dead? He is not here but has risen. (something springing to life)
John 20:19 When it was evening on that day, the first day of the week, and the doors were locked where the disciples were, for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” (something hiding)
HE IS RISEN INDEED! (each letter of ALLELUIA)
May new life…
given in Christ,
displayed in springtime,
offered in each moment,
bring you every hope and joy this season.
Bible verses are the NRSVUE found at https://www.biblegateway.com/
(Photos by Karen)
UNTIL THE RESURRECTION
This week, as we revisit the biblical stories leading up to Easter, imagine how confused the disciples must have felt about Jesus. How quickly their days changed! In one week, they most likely experienced so many emotions – joy as people waved and cheered for their beloved rabbi, frustration as Jesus risked getting into more trouble with the religious authorities, tenderness as they shared a final meal together, humility as he washed feet and instructed them to serve one another, confusion as Jesus prayed while they slept in the garden, fear and anger as he was arrested, agony as he suffered, and then grief and bewilderment as he died. Moving swiftly from triumph to tragedy, life with their beloved rabbi could no longer make sense.
Until the resurrection.
These stories also speak to the stories of our lives. As we follow our beloved rabbi Jesus, we share in the joy of his life and love, but we have the confusing, difficult, frustrating, humbling, frightening, and grieving times as well. Jesus is our helper, mentor, and guide for all of our days. But, like the disciples, we can be surprised and dismayed when our days with him don’t go as we had hoped or anticipated. We have both the triumphs and the tragedies. Sometimes our circumstances make sense, and sometimes we are left bewildered.
Until the resurrection.
With his resurrection, the disciples then knew that everything Jesus had said was true. His life had exemplified God’s visible, present love with them. His miraculous appearance among them revealed that life held so much more than their current experiences; that life is a sacred and eternal mystery beyond every heartache and hardship. His promise to always be with them would help them through whatever life would bring. They were then inspired to continue in loving service with new courage, trust, and joy.
And so can we. With his resurrection, Jesus’ life story brings a deeper meaning and a greater holy mystery to our own. His resurrection becomes an invitation for us to live life anew, to see beyond what is, to imagine what could be. Through his resurrection, his presence remains with us in every circumstance. And we can live our days in loving service – with renewed courage, trust, and joy – no matter what life may bring.
(Photo by Karen)
A PICTURE AND A POEM: AFTERMATH
Now comes another heartbreak,
another tragedy;
there isn’t one clear answer,
but it’s more than “wait and see”.
Each time there is a shooting,
it seems we point and name
the issues that affect us least,
for “We aren’t the ones to blame.”
There isn’t one solution
to relieve our griefs and cares
but this is surely going to take
much more than thoughts and prayers.
We can help correct what’s wrong
by regulating rights.
How could our inconvenience
outweigh the loss of life?
We can comfort those in pain
by speaking for the silenced.
Life will never be the same
for those caught in this violence.
We can join them in their grief,
to mourn and to lament,
then look within our broken selves;
how might we too, repent?
We can expand perspectives
to include the good of all,
to overcome our differences,
to prevent another fall.
We can smile with tenderness
and welcome someone in,
reach out to help the hurting,
then new life to begin.
We can discover beauty
in our rich diversity,
embracing one another
in love and unity.
Together, let’s envision
how wars and wounds might cease,
by walking in the harmony
of justice, love, and peace.
May our weapons and our words
be finally set aside,
as open hearts and empty hands
in gentleness abide.
Oh, may a brighter day arrive
as we move proactively
to live in lovingkindness
and consider all as “we”.
And yet another heartbreak,
another tragedy;
there isn’t one clear answer…
but I know it starts with me.
(Photo by Karen)
EXCEEDING ACCEPTANCE
I recently asked a friend, “What do you sense your soul needs most in this time of life?” His reply has remained with me, for I imagine many of us share this same longing:
“Acceptance.”
Being accepted by others – with all of our inadequacies or imperfections – is a wonderful gift that lessens our own doubts and insecurities. When we are accepted in a relationship or as part of a greater whole, our self-worth and esteem are bolstered. We are considered good enough, worthy enough to be included.
But God graciously loves us even more than this. God’s love goes beyond merely accepting to genuinely embracing. According to Merriam-Webster, to accept can be as great as “to receive (something offered) willingly” but as little as “to endure without protest or reaction.” To embrace is “to cherish, love, encircle… welcome” and “to take up especially readily or gladly.”
Two weeks ago, I shared a post about the parable of the lost sheep, in which Jesus depicts God as a loving shepherd who will never leave us behind. Jesus tells two additional stories in Luke 15 – the woman who searches for the lost coin, and the father who runs to greet his errant, prodigal son. In all three of these examples, Jesus conveys how God values and treasures us, how God eagerly seeks and reaches for us. God’s love isn’t a patient resignation that we are loved anyway, but an active desire to love us in every way. God isn’t standing there telling us, “I receive and accept you.” God is running for us, saying, “I seek and embrace you.”
Because God’s love reaches out to embrace us, we can then embrace ourselves, one another, and all of life with this same love. We can accept our imperfections, but also embrace them to use for the good of others. We can accept our inadequacies, but also embrace them as vessels to be filled with God’s goodness. We can accept one another, but also embrace one another as beloved of God. We can accept what life brings, but also embrace each moment with gratitude and joy.
May you feel the longing, seeking, reaching, embracing love of God today.
You are cherished.
You are treasured.
You are loved.
A PICTURE AND A POEM: GUIDANCE
SACRED GUIDANCE
I’m in the gentle nudges
the whispers in your ear
the dreams you will remember
and the reasons for your tears.
I’m in the words of mentors
the interrupting thought
the lyrics of a long-held song
and the “can” more than the “ought”.
I’m in the spirit’s movement
the lifestyle of my son
the sudden inspiration
and the prayers you have begun.
I’m in your deep reflection
the matters of your heart
the lessons found in seasons
the promise of fresh starts.
I’m in the sacred moments
the holy presence near
the wisdom of creation
and the life you have right here.
FINDING THE RIGHT PATH
In all affairs it’s a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted. ~ Bertrand Russell
As Jim and I enjoyed a hike through the woods, our narrow path eventually merged onto a gravel roadway. I blissfully continued on this wider route until Jim called from behind, “Honey, the path continues over here.”
I had completely missed the little blue and yellow triangles that marked our route! (If you look closely at my photo, you can see these triangles on the larger tree trunk.) Since the roadway was easier to see and follow, I neglected to pay attention to the trail marker and smaller path leading elsewhere into the woods.
These wider roadways – the usual route, the obvious path, the popular way – beckon me as I travel through this life. At times, I have been drawn to the paths that are more familiar, practical, convenient, or traditional when making life decisions. And I’m grateful that these paths brought me to this time and place in my life, but I sometimes wonder if I missed some other opportunities along the way.
For a variety of reasons, Jim and I have left our long and well-traveled path of serving within a church community. Our departure began when Jim took a leave from pastoral ministry during the pandemic. This was the first time our path didn’t simply merge onto the next one; there was no new church waiting for us, no previous community to reconnect with. In that time of isolation, while we observed our faith practices at home, we missed the gifts of belonging and serving within a church congregation. But – like so many others – we also began to question some of the purposes and practices of organized religion.
Last spring, feeling muddled about where to go from here, I designated a one-year pilgrimage, a journey of spiritual reflection and discovery. As I prayerfully discern new ways to live in faith and community, I’m watching for the easily missed trail markers, the subtly veering paths, the routes that are unfamiliar yet beckoning. My word for this year is venture, which helps foster a new sense of exploration and open-mindedness. This wandering feels unfamiliar – and yet feels right for now.
I trust that God is holding Jim and me as we continue discerning this next path.
I also trust that God is present when we gather with family and friends to share a meal… that God is hearing our praise and gratitude when we hike in the beauty of creation… that God is moving when Jim and I read, reflect, and pray each morning… that God is speaking through conversations with friends over coffee… that God is nudging when we are prompted to kindly bless another… and that maybe God is the One who initiated this restlessness in our hearts – and is guiding us to find our most faithful way home.
Have you been following a path that is familiar and convenient, but no longer feels right? Do you feel a longing to venture into new and unexplored trails? May you feel God’s companioning presence with you in these days of discovery and discernment.
Photo by Karen, Meeks Mountain, WV
A PICTURE AND A POEM: OUT
THE DIFFERENCE
“Three strikes and you’re out!”
When the rules
and the world
suggest we can’t win,
you gently encourage,
“Let’s try this again.”
“I’m sorry, but we are all out!”
When there isn’t
enough
for people in need
you lovingly nudge us,
“Please, go and help feed.”
“I am outdone!”
When the day
overwhelms
and our plans fall apart,
you quietly promise,
“You’ll have a fresh start.”
“Keep out!”
When these words
are proclaimed
on borders and walls,
you warmly invite us,
“I’m open for all.”
“I’m completely worn out!”
When we are
exhausted
and this is our plea,
you peacefully whisper,
“Come, rest in me.”
“I feel so down and out!”
When souls are
depleted,
and days feel so drear,
you kindly assure us
“For this I am here.”
~~~~~
“And remember, I am with you always…”
And we are
so grateful –
when out, you draw in,
when empty, you fill us,
when done… you begin.
Photo by Karen
Bible verse is Matthew 28:20 NRSVUE, found at https://www.biblegateway.com/
NEVER LEFT BEHIND
Take care that you do not despise one of these little ones, for I tell you, in heaven their angels continually see the face of my Father in heaven. What do you think? If a shepherd has a hundred sheep and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go in search of the one that went astray? And if he finds it, truly I tell you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine that never went astray. So it is not the will of your Father in heaven that one of these little ones should be lost.
(Matthew 18:10-14 NRSVUE)
When I was a high school freshman, our marching band traveled to the Ohio State Fair to participate in one of the parades. After our performance, my friends and I were happily enjoying all the fun and food of the fairgrounds. Our group eventually passed a restroom, and I told them I needed to stop for a few minutes. I naively expected that they would wait for me – but when I came back outside, they were gone. I frantically looked all around the area but couldn’t find them.
Reflecting on this now, I understand their excitement to continue on their way. I also recognize that I wasn’t the most popular or exciting friend. But I had a miserable afternoon as I roamed the fairgrounds, timid and alone, until I met a group of older band members who kindly let me come along. When I met my friends back at the bus to return home, no one mentioned that they had missed me or wondered where I was. I felt alone, unloved, and excluded.
After this experience, I have found comfort in the story Jesus tells of the shepherd with the lost sheep; the shepherd leaves the ninety-nine sheep in the fold to seek out the one who is missing.
I recently read this story again, and I noticed that we are not given a reason why this sheep went astray. I have usually regarded this lost sheep as being foolish, contrary, or stubborn – but in the verses leading into this story, Jesus is speaking of humble, innocent, little children, as well as our responsibility to look out for them.
Yes, this lost sheep could have been contrary or stubborn. But this sheep could also have been ill, injured, unaware, detained, or distracted. This particular one may have been timid and quiet, unnoticed by others. The flock may have even shunned this sheep for a flaw or weakness.
No matter the reason, the shepherd misses the sheep and makes every effort to bring it back. What a gift to know we have this Friend who will always watch over us, never abandon us, and never give up on us. We are never alone or forgotten.
As always, the story assures me of the constant, watchful, welcoming, inclusive love of God. But today I find another insight. Like a good shepherd, I am to keep a watchful, generous heart for the lost, lonely, errant, or left behind. And I am to reach out with a heart that is empty of judgments and assumptions – to welcome in with a heart that is full of God’s healing, restoring, all-embracing love.
A generous heart is always open, always ready to receive our going and coming. In the midst of such love we need never fear abandonment. This is the most precious gift true love offers – the experience of knowing we always belong.
― Bell Hooks, All About Love: New Visions
Photo by Robert Ramirez on Unsplash
A PICTURE AND A POEM: ARROW
ENOUGH TO KNOW
I want an arrow, God.
I would like a sign that shows
what I am meant to do,
what is the proper path to take,
what goal I should pursue.
Isn’t it enough to know
that I go along with you?
I want an arrow, God.
I would like a sign that points
me in the right direction
so everything I say and do
will be your pure reflection.
Isn’t it enough to know
you’re filled with my affection?
I want an arrow, God.
I would like a sign that gives
your lifetime guarantee
that every action, every thought
will merit love for me.
Isn’t it enough to know
my love is kindly free?
I want an arrow, God.
I would like a sign that says
just how to run the race
so that I may not come in last
but maybe win first place.
Isn’t it enough to know
that you can walk in grace?
I want an arrow, God.
I would like a sign that keeps
my life from grief and pain,
that shows me every step to take
to avoid life’s stress and strain.
Isn’t it enough to know
my peace and hope remain?
I want an arrow, God.
I would like a sign that shares
your wisdom from above;
so that I may know my purpose
is the one you would approve.
Isn’t it enough to know
you can simply live in love?
I want an arrow, God.
I would like a sign from you,
a clear, directing sign,
so I will know that I am on
a road that is divine.
Isn’t it enough to know
that you’re already mine?
(Photo by Karen)
Simply Soul Searching 