Simply Soul Searching
HOW IS GOD LOVING ME – AND WHERE IS GOD LEADING ME?
YOU ARE SO VERY GOOD
I am taking a break from the “Notice and Discover” series today, just to remind you how very good you are.
I had been reflecting on my blog posts over the years, noticing how my soul-searching has often sought new ways to deepen in spirituality, make a good difference, become a better person, or follow God’s will more faithfully. Spiritual contemplation naturally leads us to seek God, long for God, and desire to improve and please God. But today I sensed that I need – and perhaps you do, too – to be uplifted with the reminder that we are already GOOD.
The Book of Genesis provides us with some beautiful imagery about creation and God’s desire to be in relationship with us. Those familiar verses, Then God said, “Let us make humankind in our image, according to our likeness…” (vs. 1:26) and God saw everything that he had made, and indeed, it was very good (vs. 1:31), assure us that we have been created by God, and God sees us as very good.
The tender words of the psalmist (in Psalm 139:13-14) also describe how we have been tenderly created by and in the goodness of God…
For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
My gift for today is in knowing that God does not love us “anyway,” or “despite,” or “even so.” God loves us all “because.” We are loved and we are regarded as good, because we have been created by God… because God IS love… because we have been made the way God intended, “according to God’s likeness”… because we are all God’s children… because God sees us as good. God’s goodness makes us good! God’s love is never contingent; it is not contingent on our good behavior, on the depth of our faith, or on anything Jesus has done for us.
Oh, we will make mistakes. At times we will do or say things that are NOT good. And yet, we can trust that God still regards us as inherently good, beloved children. God knows us at our core, and God knows our full potential. God understands us – and the challenges life brings – and knows exactly how and why we went wrong. God then forgives us and offers us opportunities to learn and grow from our mistakes.
Our longing to deepen in faith, our desire to do what pleases God, and our yearning to follow the ways of Christ will not bring God’s greater love. However, these pursuits will bring our greater joy! Our longing and aching for more of God is a God-given gift in itself. When we seek to mature and perfect ourselves in faith and discipleship, we are accepting an invitation to the greater joy that comes with surrender. A joy that will not only fill us, but will then overflow out into our world. The world that God calls, “very good.”
You are so very good. You are shining lights in God’s eyes. Shine with joy today, dear friends. Shine on!
You make known to me the path of life;
you will fill me with joy in your presence,
with eternal pleasures at your right hand.
(Psalm 16:11 NRSV)
Photo by Karen, Hurricane, WV
Bible verses found at https://www.biblegateway.com/
FIVE MINUTE FRIDAY: ACCOUNTABILITY
I need you as my accountability partner, God.
Expect me to be present –
to bask in your loving glow.
Ask me exactly where I’ve been
when I have failed to show.
Call me to be responsible
to tend what needs I can.
Beckon me to higher ground
(but lend a helping hand).
Insist my faith be integrated
to match my words and deeds
and always keep me humble
so only you are seen.
But I thank you, God.
You forgive me when I let you down –
I’ve failed you many times;
you always keep your promises
when I have not kept mine.
You walk the path of life with me
and redirect my steps.
You remind me I am fully loved
when too often, I forget.
(Five Minute Friday is an online writing community. Each week, Kate gives us a one-word prompt and five minutes to write. You may find other posts or add your own at the link above!)
NOTICE AND DISCOVER – GRIEF
(NOTICE AND DISCOVER #5)
Monday, August 9th
If you are tempted to ignore this post, you are not alone! This was one “invitation to notice” that I accepted very grudgingly. 😉
This past Monday, Jim and I finished reading the book we had been using for our morning devotions, so I chose a new one from his shelf – A Year with C. S. Lewis – Daily Readings from His Classic Works. Turning to the readings for August, we found that the first week was filled with thoughts about grief; Lewis had written these after the loss of his beloved wife. Neither of us were eager to read these, so Jim turned instead to our daily email meditations from Richard Rohr. The topic? “The Devastation of Grief.”
“Oh dear goodness, God wants me to pay attention to grief and death,” I thought to myself. The timing is terrible. Next week, Jim is having additional heart tests for a few concerns, and later this month I have my annual check with my oncologist. But is there ever a good time to consider death? I reluctantly accepted the invitation…
~~~~~
The days are growing shorter as we head toward the autumn season. My life is also heading into an autumn season, as I now have more years behind me than I have ahead of me. These passing years – along with Jim’s heart surgery and my previous cancer – have increased my awareness of the brevity of life. Sometimes I think about the things I will miss one day, even the little daily delights of life. And yet, I feel assured that in the eternal realm, I will find more incredible joys than any earthly gift can bring.
My only heartache about death comes when I imagine leaving my loved ones, at least for a time. Were I to lose a loved one, or they were to lose me, the deep grief of our temporary separation is the only pain I fear. Our relationships are the real treasures of this world.
~~~~~
I recently started listening to Mitch Albom’s podcast, “The Tuesday People” on my morning walks. Mitch shares the insights he learned from his college professor, Morrie Schwartz, as Morrie was dying. So I wasn’t surprised that his conversations were about death this past Monday – and I knew that God would provide some revelations for me in the listening.
The first episode was called, “Don’t Procrastinate Your Life Away.” From Morrie’s life, Mitch has learned to let the regrets of the past go, but also to not let new regrets pile up. In his introduction, he describes “those moments that give us pause as to how long we should put off the things that we really want to do…” and invites us to ask “What’s really keeping me from doing what I’ve wanted to do for a while now?”
The second episode was called, “A Tuesday People Retrospective,” and Mitch shared some highlights of Morrie’s best lessons. Morrie had gently advised Mitch to not wait to forgive someone, because there may come a time when it will be too late. Another lesson was in his description of his “perfect day” – he only talked of ordinary times spent with loved ones. His words that most resonated and comforted me were, “Death ends a life but not a relationship.”1
For these very reasons, I was blessed by my cancer. When we must face the possibility of death more fully, we don’t hesitate to do what is important, especially to make our relationships right. During that year of illness and treatments, a few relationships were forgiven and restored, new friendships were fostered, old friends were reconnected, precious words of love were shared, keepsake photos were taken, kindnesses were given and received. This was the best gift of all – to not have any lingering hurts, unspoken words, or deep regrets with my beloved family and friends.
~~~~~
My invitation for today is to never postpone loving and caring for one another.
Is there someone I have hurt who could use my sincere apology? Are there friends I appreciate but have not taken the time to let them know? Who might enjoy receiving a letter, call, or message from me today?
We may still need to be socially distant and careful, but can I find creative ways to connect with dear ones? Should I try to plan our family vacation (the third attempt) for next year?
At the end of this day, what will I have done to help someone else? How will I encourage, uplift, love, inspire, affirm, and speak my heart with the ones who are so important in my life?
How will I go to bed with no regrets tonight?
~~~~~
I hope my invitation also resonates with all of you. Please don’t put off spending time, reaching out, cherishing, and genuinely appreciating the people in your life.
My prayers for you continue.
1Podcast and quotes found at https://www.mitchalbom.com/tuesday-people/
Photo by Karen, Hurricane, WV
FIVE MINUTE FRIDAY: FROM
Today’s prompt has me thinking about the question, “Where are you from?”
I notice that my answer depends on how far I am from my birthplace home…
When I am in Northwest Ohio, I reply, “Northwood” (the smaller city where I was born and raised) and I immediately feel a certain bond, a connection with anyone who is from my hometown. When I am in the Midwest, I generally reply with the more well-known city, “Toledo,” and again, feel an affinity for anyone who is from the Toledo area. Traveling farther in the U.S., I will simply reply, “Ohio” – and I imagine if I were to travel internationally, I would probably answer, “The United States.” Each time, I will sense a bonded connection with all who live within those ever-widening areas.
As my life experiences and travels expand, my sense of who makes up my tribe, my people, also becomes more expansive. Perhaps one day, I might answer, “The planet we call Earth,” and claim the entire world as my kindred community.
We are all infinitely connected, you and I. We are all from the same origin, the same Creator of the universe and beyond.
Welcome to my tribe.
(Five Minute Friday is an online writing community. Each week, Kate gives us a one-word prompt and five minutes to write. You may find other posts or add your own at the link above!)
NOTICE AND DISCOVER – MERIT OR PRIVILEGE?
(NOTICE AND DISCOVER #4)
Monday, August 2nd
Merit:
~ something that deserves or justifies a reward or commendation
Privilege:
~ a right, immunity, or benefit enjoyed by a particular person or a restricted group of people beyond the advantages of most*
This past Friday, I had a 9:00 appointment at the Department of Motor Vehicles. When I arrived, there were 30-40 people already standing in a line that went out the door and down the sidewalk! But because I had scheduled an appointment, I was able to walk past all of them to stand in a line designated for “Appointments Only.” As the next clerk became available, a couple from the regular line started to walk in front of me toward that window; the clerk told them to go back in line and invited me up instead. I was then moved swiftly through the license renewal process, and I was back on the road with my new license in under fifteen minutes.
I had mixed feelings about all of this…
In one way, I felt that I deserved this special treatment. I had tried to schedule my appointment back in May, when my license was about to expire. The DMV website strongly recommended making an appointment because of Covid-19 and social distancing restrictions. Their first available appointment wasn’t until July 8th, so I reserved that one. When that day finally arrived, I received a call that the computer system was down and I needed to reschedule! I then took the next available time, July 19th. On that morning, I actually went all the way to the DMV and was told that the computer system was down AGAIN. I had to return home and wait for someone to call with a new appointment.
So on Friday, I felt that my privilege of ease and efficiency was merited and deserved.
In another way, I felt uncomfortable with my priority treatment while all these people continued to wait in line. I wanted to shout, “Hey folks, I had a tough time getting to this point, too; I am with you!” If I am honest, I also felt uncomfortable with the way I inwardly felt proud, wise, and gleeful about my privileged treatment. I thought to myself, “Hey folks, see how easily this is done? Make an appointment!”
The root of my discomfort was that I didn’t want to be considered privileged when I had merited this moment…
The recent Five Minute Friday prompt (see FIVE MINUTE FRIDAY: DRIVE ) was my invitation to pay attention to God’s movement at the DMV that day. So later, I contemplated these mixed emotions and began to realize the ways I am privileged. I have had so many undeserved advantages that led to my experience of special treatment.
For example, I have internet service in an area where the hills or poverty often keep others without service. I am able to read, I have the knowledge of website navigation, and I have a cell phone to receive notice of cancelations. I have the freedom of a flexible time schedule that can accommodate appointments. We have the financial ability to pay our property tax and the cost of my license. I have a car to drive to the DMV, and the health to walk in. I even had fearful but caring parents and a cranky driving instructor who taught me to drive those years ago.
The people waiting in line could have easily perceived me as privileged, and they would be right.
~~~~~
Here are my invitations for this week. Do they resonate with yours?
Though there will always be inequalities and unfair advantages, what can I do to enable someone to have a better chance for a better life? How might I use my advantages and abilities in service for others?
Can I celebrate my small victories without forgetting those who helped me along the way? Can I remain humble, knowing that others could celebrate the same successes under different circumstances? How might I refrain from feeling entitled?
Might I respond, “I don’t deserve this!” for my blessings as readily as I do for my hardships?
Do we merit God’s goodness simply because God calls us beloved, and so regards all of us worthy of goodness and blessing? How might I help God bring that goodness to others?
What small miracles and movements are you noticing this week?
My prayers for you continue.
~~~~~
A few hours before posting this blog, I read this…
“Everything that we have and do and are and accomplish is because of God’s immense love for us and empowerment of us.”1
And once again, I marvel at the goodness of God in these small daily miracles.
~~~~~
*Definitions from Dictionary.com
1Rubietta, Jane. Resting Place – A Personal Guide to Spiritual Retreats. Downers Grove: InterVarsity Press, 2005. Paperback.
Photo by Karen, Winfield, WV
FIVE MINUTE FRIDAY: DRIVE
Our word prompt for today’s Five Minute Friday, DRIVE, is especially timely for me, as Jim and I just drove back home to West Virginia after visiting our daughter and grandsons in Ohio…
We actually enjoy our four-hour drive. We love to watch the landscape gradually evolve from wide-open fields to rolling hills. We pack a cooler of snacks of fruit, nuts, cheese, crackers, and sparkling water to refresh us. We stop along the way to stretch a bit. We listen to music or podcasts, we talk about life, and sometimes we sit in comfortable silence, deep in our own thoughts.
Today I am noticing how life is like the drive home. There are times when life feels wide-open with possibility, when we can clearly see the way ahead. We drive with ease, enjoying the spacious scenery and the camaraderie. Then there are times when we have to pay close attention to what is directly before us, as we clutch the steering wheel and silence ourselves to navigate construction zones, accidents, or blind curves.
The landscape of our life journey is ever evolving, ever changing, too. There are times when we feel the freedom and ease of clear and wide routes. There are times when we struggle to navigate the next mile. Wherever we are on this road of life, we have a Companion for our journey. We have One who offers us refreshment for our spirits, rest for our souls, and guidance for our routes.
We have One who helps us find the often unexpected but delightful beauty in every changing scene.
Side note: I am writing this post early, because I have a 9:00 appointment at… the Department of Motor Vehicles! I am finding a special God-synchronicity in the timing of this prompt. More about that on Monday…
(Five Minute Friday is an online writing community. Each week, Kate gives us a one-word prompt and five minutes to write. You may find other posts or add your own at the link above!)
NOTICE AND DISCOVER – POWER
(NOTICE AND DISCOVER #3)
Monday, July 26th
I felt a little ridiculous taking this photo. I didn’t understand why I would be so prompted; I had very little idea of what this cylinder even was. I only knew it had a purpose, obviously something to do with electrical power.
But as I continued my walk, I began thinking about the ways we continue to learn and grow throughout our lives. As I keep learning, I realize I have much more to learn! There are times when I read old blog posts and want to rewrite some of them, because of new insights I have gained since then. I began to see this cylinder as a humbling symbol to remind me that I still have much to learn; that I will not always be right; that I should seek every opportunity to become better informed.
My thoughts went deeper then… into the great mystery of God. God is so awesome, infinite, and beyond our understanding, that to try to describe God is to limit God. Could we ever truly envision or fully know God?
When I arrived home, I looked up information about this type of electrical cannister. I learned that this is a transformer; its purpose is to lower the high voltage coming from the main long-distance power lines into the voltage we can use in our homes.
Suddenly I thought, “This is how God works!” The power of God would be too much for us to comprehend or take in, but God transforms this power and love into ways we can absorb and understand. God’s love is transformed for us through Jesus. Through the Word and words. Through the Spirit. Through our faith and experiences. Through creation.
Even through gentle nudges to take photos.
With this thought, there came another parallel idea. How often do we take for granted the electricity that provides our homes with light, warmth, coolness, and other helpful comforts? When we turn on a light, we don’t hear electricity say, “You have me to thank for this!” Never once have I said, “Thank you, electricity, for cooling me on this hot day.” We may appreciate what we notice – such as the light and the comfort – while not giving much thought about the power supply that enables them to bless us.
How often do we do this with God? Do we appreciate our gifts, but not always the One who provides them?
God is always moving, always supplying us with power for every need, always enlightening, always warming our hearts and refreshing our souls. God’s incredible power has been transformed into quiet, subtle, softer ways that we can comprehend and embrace. Oh, there may be lightning bolts once in a while! But God chooses to humbly become small so that we might glimpse and know God’s incredible love in the ways we can comprehend.
Soon after I took this photo and began pondering these thoughts, I listened to another podcast episode of “Learning How to See.” I heard Brian McLaren say this:
We do not see everything so we do not know everything. We do not even know how much we do not know. Nor do we know how much of what we know is actually impartial, distorted or false. That is why we seek to
open our eyes to encounter the world afresh in humility and in silent wonder to learn to see.1
This was another small God-miracle – these additional thoughts supplemented my first observations, again reminding me that I am to be attentive and to humbly remain a learner in all things!
~~~~~
This week, is my invitation first of all a reminder that I still have much to learn? Am I being invited to ask for both wisdom and humility in my prayers? How might I pay better attention to the lessons God is revealing? How might I be more aware and grateful for God’s power all around and within me?
Perhaps more importantly, how does God want to transform me into a lesser conduit of God’s power? How might I serve as a small, humble vessel of God’s infinite love, for others to more readily receive?
Do these questions resonate with your soul this week? Where are you noticing God’s daily miracles?
My prayers for you continue.
1Boxes Inside Boxes — Center for Action and Contemplation (cac.org)
Photo by Karen, Hurricane, WV
Thinking about the ways we learn and grow, you may be interested in my husband Jim’s interesting and humorous new blog: Ruminations of an Ultracrepidarian – Observations and Opinions about Life and Faith (who-asked-me.com)
FIVE MINUTE FRIDAY: ORDER
We make a good team. Jim loves a clean house with sparkling bathrooms and shiny floors. I love an organized house with tidy closets and little clutter. When everything is clean and organized, our home serves as our sanctuary; we find refuge from the chaos or messiness of life that can sometimes surround or overwhelm us. Today’s prompt, ORDER, makes us smile!
And yet, as people of faith we are called to journey into this world, to confront the messes, to restore the brokenness, to face the chaos, to serve one another, and to do all the good we can. As tempting as it may be to seclude ourselves in our safe and secure – and orderly – home, we know that abundant life is much more than that.
Where can we find our sanctuary, our refuge as we are out in the world?
We can order our days with prayer, practices, and presence. We can keep Christ as our centering point. We can seek the kingdom amid the mess. We can take time for those sanctuary moments, to rest and reflect, to replenish and regroup. We can ask for peace, strength, patience, and joy for our journey.
We can trust that the One who has created and ordered the infinite universe can surely order our days.
(Five Minute Friday is an online writing community. Each week, we are given a one-word prompt and five minutes to write. You may find other posts or add your own at the link above!)
NOTICE AND DISCOVER – NARROW ROAD
(NOTICE AND DISCOVER #2)
Monday, July 19
I actually went past this sign as I walked along in the morning sunshine, but further down the road, I was suddenly nudged to take a photo of these words. Turning back, I snapped the picture – and was surprised by a flood of enthusiasm and inspiration! I then knew that this is the theme I was to notice this week. And each day, I found messages that enhanced or deepened this narrow road idea. I regard these as small miracles of God, discovered only because I was prompted to notice.
My initial thoughts went to these familiar words of Jesus in the book of Matthew:
Enter through the narrow gate, for wide is the gate and broad is the way leading to destruction and many are the ones entering through it. How narrow (is) the gate and constricted the road leading to life and few are the ones finding it. (Matthew 7:13-14, from the Interlinear Translation from Greek to English)
There was a time when I interpreted these words as an instruction to follow all of the strict rules found in the Bible in order to get into heaven. If I strayed from the narrow road, I would end up in hell! But the more I know and love about Jesus, the more I see this narrow road as the way of truth, of kingdom living here and now. Our road is not made narrow by boundary walls of rules and stipulations, but by keeping our focus on Jesus and allowing him to lead the way.
Jesus comes to free us, to give us abundant life in him, to open us to love and goodness. Instead of walking in fear, we can hold his hand in childlike trust as we follow this narrow road. The road is not a difficult one of self-striving, but an invitation to greater things, to joyful and abundant life. We can stop worrying about achieving perfect righteousness as we trust the Spirit to work within us.
A few days later, @chasinggraceinsta posted a beautiful photo on Instagram with the caption, “Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders.”
Amen, and thank you, God. The road may be narrow – but may our trust be expansive.
Finally, this idea was extended further by yet another small God-moment. Jim read our next devotional reading from We Make the Road by Walking called, “A New Path to Aliveness,” (wow! 🙂 ). Brian McLaren writes about Jesus’s message in Matthew 5:17-48:
Jesus employs his “you have heard it said… but I say…” pattern once more, perhaps the most radical example of all. Tradition always requires love and responsibility toward friends and neighbors, people we like, people like us, people “of our kind.” That is a big step beyond utter selfishness and narcissism. But Jesus says the road of tradition was never meant to end there. Love should be extended farther than before, to outsiders as well as insiders, to “them” as well as “us,” even to our enemies. We may not have walked the road that far yet, but that is God’s intent for us… God is out ahead of us, calling us forward – not to stay where tradition has brought us so far, and not to defy tradition reactively, but to fulfill the highest and best intent of tradition, to make the road by walking forward together.1
Our narrow road is the road of love. Following Jesus on that narrow road, we keep walking further into his love, and further into our love for one another. We seek ways to love and serve others well, to be Christ for them in our words and actions. Thanks to Jesus, what a beautiful road this narrow road can be! It truly is the road “leading to life.”
What are the invitations this week? How might I follow Christ more closely, trust him more fully, love him more deeply? Can I learn to look to God for my truth rather than comparing myself to the standards and expectations of the world? Where might I narrow my focus in order to expand – is this an extension of last week, am I being called to live more simply, to see God’s glory in the everyday? What things do I perceive as limits that keep me from expanding in Christ? How might I expand in love?
Are these questions yours, too? Or have you noticed something else this week? What are you discovering in your noticing?
My prayers for you continue.
1McLaren, Brian. We Make the Road by Walking. Jericho Books, 2014.
Photo by Karen, Hurricane, WV
FIVE MINUTE FRIDAY: STRONG
Let me be strong in you, God.
Let my strength come not from striving
but from centering
in you.
Let my strength come not from pushing
but from placing
myself in your hands.
Let my strength come not from grit
but from your grace
alone.
Let my strength come not from power
but from the peace
only you can give.
In this strength, I pray…
to refrain from reacting with hurtful words or actions
to return kindness and gentleness in the face of hostility
to walk gently as a steward of this earth
to stand firm in times of trial
to seek understanding in conflict
and to know when to speak or remain silent.
Amen.
(Five Minute Friday is an online writing community. Each week, we are given a one-word prompt and five minutes to write. You may find other posts or add your own at the link above!)
Simply Soul Searching 